Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize