people are starting to question the shark bite story
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
party gras won. party gras always wins.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize