Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
