i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
vagina is talking i cant
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
OPIZZABONMYDICK
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize