one might say we're banned from that church
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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