All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
