When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
