There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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