just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize