Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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