dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Randomize
