So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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