So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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