Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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