I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
