So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Don't EVER smell your tampon
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Randomize
