dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize