Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
