I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
did i just pee glitter
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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