So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
