I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
