i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
God, I missed his penis.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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