I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
