so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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