I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Semen is not good for contacts.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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