Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize