best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
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