he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
