ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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