im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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