So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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