go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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