whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Vodka?
Forever.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize