Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Randomize
