My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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