I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
