I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Randomize
