dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
