So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Randomize
