I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Randomize
