I wish I could punch you in the face.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
