Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
