Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
soo... how was my night?
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