Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize