And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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