No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Randomize
