Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Randomize