i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Just cropdusted the office
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
