OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
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