I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
