hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
be right there i have to get my cape
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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